Mystery Science Theater 3000: The King and I
by AdamGregory03
Summary: First of many fan-made MST3Ks. Adam and his robotic allies are sent The King and I. No, not the timeless musical, but a pandered up animated version made by the same people who made Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer. Needless to say, mockery ensues for Anna and the King of Siam.
1. Theme Song

**AdamGregory03's MST3K**  
(DISCLAIMER: _Italic_ text is used to show what is happening or being said in the film being watched, or during the theme song. Which is right now.)

_In the not too distant future,_

_The year twenty-two fifteen,_

_(La la la)_

_There was a guy named Lord Hagus_

_Who was hatchin' an evil scheme._

_A guy named Adam worked for him,_

_Not knowing his future's looking grim._

_Hagus' plan needed a good test case,_

_So he conked him on the head and shot him into space._

_(THIS WASN'T IN THE CONTRAAAAACT!)_

Lord Hagus: _"I'll send him cheesy movies,_

_The worst I can find."_

Lord Hagus & Henchmen: _(La la la)_

Lord Hagus: _"He'll have to sit and watch them all,_

_While I monitor his mind."_

_(La la la)_

_Now keep in mind Adam can't control_

_When the movies begin or end,_

_Because he used those extra parts_

_To make his robot friends._

Robot roll call!

Cambot! ("You're on!")

Gypsy! ("Oh my stars!")

Tom Servo! ("Hello, ladies!")

Crooooow! ("I'm different!")

_Now if you're wondering how he eats and breathes,_

_And other scientific facts,_

_(La la la)_

_Just remember it's only a fan fiction,_

_You should really just relax._

_For Mystery Science Theater,_

_Three-thousand._

(Twang!)


	2. Opening

**AdamGregory03's MST3K**  
Experiment #001: The King and I  
(Opening)

-SATELITE OF LOVE, COCKPIT-

Cambot is fixated on the window. In front of the window are four chairs, three of them sitting from left to right, Crow, Gypsy, and Tom Servo. Tom is reading a magazine.

CROW: "Space. It's really big. So big you'd probably lose you're credit card in it."

TOM SERVO: "Ooh, baby!"

GYPSY: (Glances over) "Servo!"

TOM SERVO: "What?"

GYPSY: "Playbot? Really? That is so degrading!"

CROW: "Ooh, is that the Norweigan models issue?"

Adam suddenly comes in looking cheerful.

ADAM: "Good morning, Staelite of Love!"

CROW: "Someone got up on the right side of the bed."

ADAM: "You bet!" (Holds up a bag) "I tried some of this new prozac brand coffee and I feel GREAT! In fact, it's a beautiful day outside! Let's go out and enjoy it!"

TOM SERVO: (Simoutaneously) "Mmm, no."

GYPSY: (Simoutaneously) "No thank you."

CROW: (Simoutaneously) "Not smart, dude."

ADAM: "What? How come, guys?"

CROW: "It's a cold and empty universe out there, Adam."

ADAM: "Well, excuse me for being an optimist." (Leaves)

Pause.

TOM SERVO: "He forgot we we're in outer space again, didn't he?"

Adam is suddenly seen floating in front of the window, looking as if he is screaming, though no sound is heard.

CROW: "Huh. So it's true."

TOM SERVO: "You're turn to go get him, Gypsy."

GYPSY: "Okay."


	3. Introduction

**AdamGregory03's MST3K**  
Experiment #001: The King and I  
(Introduction)

-SATELITE OF LOVE-

Adam is seen wrapped in a blanket, with Tom Servo and Crow by his side.

TOM SERVO: "You feeling any better?"

ADAM: "Yeah, now that I've had the oxygen restored." (Pushes away coffee bag) "Do me a favor and keep me away from that stuff."

TOM SERVO: "Noted."

A yellow buzzer goes off on the control panel.

CROW: "Mr. Grinch is calling."

ADAM: "Cambot, bring up Lord Hagus."

-LORD HAGUS' THRONEROOM-

Lord Hagus is a grey-skinned and wrinkly figure with red eyes that have black pupils. He is clad in dark grey robes and hood and has long, claw-like fingers.

LORD HAGUS: "Hello there, test monkeys. You're favorite power-hungry villain calling. How is outer space treating you?"

-SATELITE OF LOVE-

ADAM: "Not well, trust me. So what's todays evil experiment, Lord H?"

-LORD HAGUS' THRONEROOM-

LORD HAGUS: "Oh, you know me, I like to keep it simple. Today I'm just genetically altering rats to become monsters of destruction. Snive, be careful with that serum!"

Camera pans over to a bipedal weasel-like creature with a lab coat, German accent, and a worried expression on his face as he is about to stick a needle of the serum into a rat.

SNIVE: "Ya, I know..."

A rat gets out of his grip.

SNIVE: "Ach! Get back here, rodent!"

-SATELITE OF LOVE-

ADAM: "He should probably be careful with the way he's handling those."

-LORD HAGUS' THRONEROOM-

LORD HAGUS: "Oh please. What would you-"

(A prick is heard)

SNIVE: "YOW! Oh... oh no..."

LORD HAGUS: "-know?"

Suddenly, low growling is heard. It shows Snive's shadow looms over Hagus, only it has frizzier fur and longer fangs. Drool drips on Lord Hagus.

LORD HAGUS: (Loosens neck collar sweating) "Um, heh heh... How about I leave you with Evette to send you today's um, film... Snive, what're you dong? SNIVE, WAIT-!"

Camera suddenly cuts to outside the throneroom to a secretary's office where Evette is, filing her nails. She is an attractive blonde woman with curled hair, a pair of glasses, pearl earings, and wearing purple lipstick. Meanwhile, inside the throneroom, scratches, growls, and screams are heard.

LORD HAGUS: "SNIVE, DOWN! IT'S ME, YOU'RE MASTER, LORD HAGUS! OBEY ME-YOWW! I NEED THAT! AAAHH!"

EVETTE: "Okay guys, you're movie today is The King and I."

-SATELITE OF LOVE-

ADAM: "The King and I? Don't people actually like that movie?"

-LORD HAGUS' THRONEROOM EXTERIOR-

EVETTE: "Not this version, sweetie."

LORD HAGUS: "MY TOES!"

EVETTE: "YA WANT ME TO CALL ANIMAL CONTROL OR SOMETHIN'?"

LORD HAGUS: "YES, YES PLEASE! SNIVE, BACK!"

-SATELITE OF LOVE-

TOM SERVO: "Can't say the guy doesn't deserve that."

CROW: "Mm-hm, definitely."

Suddenly, the buzzer goes off and red lights begin flashing in the cockpit, with the sign over the door blinking the words "INCOMING FILM". Everyone gets into a panic as they make they're way to the theater.


End file.
